Saturday, October 31, 2009

Conscience


Why Nicole was brave to speak out
Having a conscience matters, says this actress
Samantha Morton
The Guardian, Monday 26 October 2009

Last week Nicole Kidman told the US Congress that Hollywood contributed to violence against women by portraying them as sex objects, and Matt Damon revealed that he turned down scripts if they featured gratuitous violence. How hard is it for actors to make decisions of conscience?

I have a huge issue with Hollywood actors who don't use their power in a way that's really constructive. For example, if they do a big blockbuster action film and they're playing someone violent, yet they don't have a say over the movie's poster and whether they appear naked in it, or with weapons. What does that say to the children who are in the backs of cars being driven around cities?

I do have a say in those things and if people don't want to work with me, then they don't. You want to be proud of all the choices you make and your reasons for making them.

When I receive a script the first thing I ask my agent is: what's it about, who is making it and who is producing it? These considerations are not always straightforward. When, for instance, I was sent the script for Longford (2006), in which I played the part of Myra Hindley, my initial instinct was: no. "It's a very good script," my agent said. "I don't care," I replied.

But I trust my agent, and when I read the script, I felt educated by it. So although that role attracted public dismay as well as critical acclaim, I felt my performance was part of a bigger message.

But not everyone gets it. After I played Iris in Under the Skin (1997), a woman who was harming herself through sex and being very promiscuous as part of a medical condition, I got sent every script going for women who would open their legs at anything. I was reading them thinking: "There's no reason whatsoever for making this film."

Actors can be manipulated. You can think you are involved in something with a message, and it can turn into something else altogether. You are at the mercy of the director, the director is at the mercy of the producer, and the producer is at the mercy of the financier. People can change the script while you're working and they have the right to do so. And you have to cooperate, otherwise you are deemed unsupportive.

A scene can be directed in a way that you had no concept of. A film I made recently, which I thought was about one thing, somehow turned into a different kind of film altogether. I had no idea that was going to happen. I felt abused by it.

I admire Nicole Kidman for speaking out. It was a brave thing to do. For her, the difficulties multiply – it's a different world. You have obligations, you have to respect the studios that keep employing you. You probably have houses all over the world you would like to keep . . . It must be hard at times to keep making conscientious choices – and not everyone does. Some people think they just want to act, and don't care about the broader message.

Friday, October 30, 2009

I'm Not Being Paid To Say This

Hello. Why, today I experienced the best product aftercare ever in my life and had to come here to rave about it.

It's the X-Mini capsule speaker. I walked away from their office elated, having brought in my 1.5 year old 1st generation X-Mini to exchange its mangled retractable cable which didn't work anymore. Don't get me wrong, I've used and abused my X-Mini in jam sessions, worship practices, cross-country bus trips, (chasing unclean spirits away in) hotel rooms, missionaries' homes, doing open-air dancing, presentations, etc.... Next to my iPod, Bible and trusty notebook, it's one of my most utilized tools and I'm happy with the mileage I've gotten out of it.



And so, it was nice enough of them to offer to replace the cable for free.... but when the guy-in-charge tested my dusty-&-gummy-@-same-time speaker, he discovered it wasn't working - probably from all the sizzling the faulty cable caused it, retreated inside and returned with a BRAND-NEW speaker in its box, tested it and gave it to me! Wow! On top of that, he was extremely flexible (no, he didn't do somersaults in front of me) and didn't ask any questions except how old my X-Mini was. Can you beat that? Such a demonstration that they stand by their products and customers. At the end of the day, their goodwill and generosity simply amazed me, blessed me and made me proud of this Singapore start-up.

I mean, I dig good ethics and integrity. I believe that prosperity in businesses, societies.... right down to your personal life.... is a fruit of applying kingdom principles like generosity or not cutting corners with your customers.  And I like what the company represents - constant innovation, a powerful product that delivers effectively, and catching the cutting-edge vibe of this generation.

Well, so I am another satisfied customer and proud that Singapore has produced such an enterprise. I don't buy a lot of 'techie stuff', but I've had enough bloopers with my laptop conglomerate (incidentally, wasn't I talking about 'fruits'?) to know whether a company truly values the consumer or has a kingdom philosophy.

Oh, did I mention that as I left, the guy-in-charge had the glowing grace to turn back, as if remembering something, to say, "Have a good weekend!" genuinely. Another brownie point for them!

I feel so blessed and was thanking God for showing me such goodwill today and reminding me of the kind of person He wants me to be. Plus, I was broke this month but now have a new X-Mini! It's been a great day =)

Quote of the Day

"A great worship leader does not demand worship but inspires worship." 


Do we demand or inspire?


Friday, October 23, 2009

At a particular vocal class, I learnt that the more I try to please my audience, the less I find. Immediately after that class, I found myself in a meeting where I felt I had to please someone and give her what she wanted. As a result, during that time I was uncomfortable, struggling to flow with God and unable to be who I really am or give fully from my heart.

My trainer said this :
"We try so hard to hit the high notes, pulling and forcing and straining, but it's so difficult. Then we take a step back and let our voice find the note naturally, without straining and pushing, and although it sounds uncomfortable and unfamiliar to us, it's right."

As I sieved through today, my questions of whether what I did was good enough or if I did it the way she wanted pressed into my heart. I should have tried to please less, and not allowed myself to let that hang over me. Because in trying so hard, I found less. I was trying to mold my actions into something I felt she wanted, but maybe that wasn't what was really needed. I could only have found it by giving up my right to be protected from judgement and letting the natural take place - in this sense, God showing up. 



How often do we stress ourselves up and underperform our potential by trying to live up to people's expectations?


Lord Jesus, I repent of pleasing man instead of You. I choose not to be affected by comments, and turn a blind eye to being judged, that I may find the place of rest and peace in You. No need to perform, no need to force. Amen.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

To-Die-For

I'm dying to make music like this.....

Injustice at our doorstep


An excerpt from Valerictorian gripped me today:

I was nine.

One afternoon,
a commotion drew me
to the window.

A Chinese man,
highly likely a construction supervisor,
was barking into the face
of an Indian worker.

His words
 were
ugly, wicked and inhuman.

As he spluttered on,
the pudgy bully
pounded his
 victim's head
with a long, rolled up document.

Heartbreaking.
Anger.
Tears.

I tiptoed,
pressed my face
as much as I could against the window grills
and
yelled,
with all the power in my lungs,

'SHUT UP!'

Then,
I didn't know what else 
I could do for the
Indian man.

It happens, at our doorstep. 
Stand in the gap.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Dream Centre

Last Saturday night, the base went out to do a mooncake distribution to the Chinese ladies in Geylang. Debbie felt the need to do something for these girls as Mooncake Festival is the second-most important festival in China where families celebrate together. Thus they would be feeling great sadness being away from their families.  


I ran into a young girl on the busy street just outside the base. She didn't know what I wanted until I spelt out that it was Mooncake Festival and we were Christians wanting to bless her with a mooncake. Her bewildered face gave way to a huge smile and she revealed her vulnerability, saying, "This is the first time that such a thing is happening to me.... the feeling is strange!" And as we walked off, she was left smiling from ear-to-ear and waved goodbye happily, girlishly. 


Over the years, YWAM Singapore has been trying to establish a ministry to people in Geylang. Geylang is the hotbed of vice, in all forms. I've had a contact call me late at night and tell me he's in Geylang, helpless, vulnerable and confused after a big argument with his wife about the family's major financial trouble, and he did something he regretted, was full of remorse and needed a friend to set him straight and give some support. 


I know of 18-year-olds who hang out in the dark alleys running gambling dens and working with their fathers who do the same. I know my friend's elderly father who goes to Geylang for his fix every day, oblivious to the fact that his family knows and has to endure the humiliation. 


You see, I can put faces to the vice. Geylang, to me, is not "a dirty area full of prostitutes, foreign workers and danger".... it is a place where strongholds over people turn them to sin. But ask yourself: if the people there - middle-aged uncles with wives and children at home; choiceless women duped into prostitution; immigrants living in a harsh, loveless environment - if these were people you know, wouldn't you do something for them? Wouldn't you love them and help them? 


Lives are going down the drain. About 3 or 4 years ago, I had the privilege of meeting Matthew Barnett of the Dream Centre. The Dream Centre started as a small church in Los Angeles, with this 20-year-old white guy conducting services in a bad, bad neighbourhood. He faced gangsters, shootings, drugs and homeless folk who looked and smelt bad, at the doorsteps of his church. Yet, he persevered in his call to transform the city by letting these gangsters into church services, nervous as he was; feeding the hungry; praying for the insane/hurting/drugged-out/gun-toters as he risked his life. Today, the Dream Centre is my inspiration for what we can sow by laying our lives down and letting God rule.  


Matthew Barnett was in Singapore then to speak at a conference, and I had gone specially to hear his keynote message. Like an awe-struck fan, I zipped to his side when he finished his message, introduced myself as a YWAMer and told him we had been trying to minister in a rough neighbourhood, like his. 


"Oh you're from YWAM!" His eyes lit up, like something clicked. "You guys are doing such a great job!" Wow, I was floored. My 'idol' knew about us and thought we were doing something worthy. He actually gave me his mobile number and asked me to call him while he was in Singapore if I wanted to meet up. I kept that mobile number in my phone for a good number of years.... I never called him because.... well, sheepishly, I didn't feel that I could sustain enough conversation about what we had done. Truth is, I felt alone in my cause. I wasn't sure if it amounted to anything because there were so few of us championing this.


So I'm glad we went out to the streets last Saturday in droves. I'm glad Debbie isn't alone, and I really hope you heard my heart and God's as you read this. I'm glad this seems like a new season for our base, one of unity and deeper relationships, and a corporate call to the unreached.